My eyes are the ugliest shade of brown you ever knew existed, and one of them is significantly larger than the other. Same with my tits. (Not the brown thing, but the varying sizes thing.) It takes two and a half hours to de-fro my hair, so I tend to go days without so much as brushing it. My body is covered in bruises and scars, and if I go longer than two weeks without getting them waxed, my eyebrows will literally take over my fucking face. I’m the only person I know who can gain ten pounds in less than a week, and more than five people have compared my big toes to Chicken McNuggets. I have cankles, a huge nose, and crooked bottom teeth.

But fuck am I beautiful.

And I just wanted to remind you that you are too.